Monday, February 8, 2010

Just Not Level

Even with the best tools for Diabetes Management we have these days, achieving balance and consistent control is an ever-elusive fact of life. We can try, and sometimes glimpse that goal we're working toward, but the balance is so often short-lived.

We try to level it off, but just can't find a way even with all the tools we have. Sadly, the Ups & Downs often begin when we need consistecy the most.

Recently, I've been struggling with unexplained Highs and Lows. The rollercoaster ride that takes me from the high-hundreds to mid-double digits.

We rack our brains for the causes of the unbalance: inaccurate carb counts, too little or too much insulin, resistence, influencial exercise, the way the wind is blowing, the odd or even number on the clock.... You get the point. Sometimes, it seems as if we've done everything right as much as humanly possible, yet something is off.

That's the most frustrating part. It can make the daily D-routine, which is overwhelming and consuming in itself, seem even more overwhelming and sometimes not worth effort. The stress we put ourselves through, just to find more stress at the end of the tunnel.

Yet, it is what it is. There's no break. We must always take advantage of the tools we have - pumps, needles, blood monitoring regularly and with a CGM if that's an option, carb counting, exercise routines, and all else. Often, it's like these tools are needed to tighten or loosen up a bolt just a bit. We can use a tape measure, and in the end, we just want to make sure the picture is hanging level on the wall. (If my diabetes symbolized the way fixtures hang in my house, though, everything would be off level. You'd have to walk around with your head cocked to the side.)

After 26 years, the trends and reasons can be easier to find at times yet completely random and out-of-the-blue at times. It makes you want to toss out the screwdriver and just take a hammer to crush Diabetes. It can be emotionally challenging, not to mention financially burdensome as you try to equip yourself to deal with the daily D-challenges.

Yet, we in the Diabetes Community plug on in this ever-adventurous ride.

5 comments:

Crystal said...

Balance? What balance? ;-)

Love the pic.

Lorraine said...

Such a creative photo!

Cherise said...

Awesome pic! Diabetes is a balancing act.

Cherise said...

Awesome pic! Diabetes is a balancing act.

olivejooice said...

This was a great post! I was just thinking about this today- when I couldn't figure out why my blood sugar was 420 mg/dl. Its how we all feel.