Friday, May 19, 2017

One, Two, Three... And Down We Go

So, Day Four of Diabetes Blog Week 2017.

Topic: What Brings Me Down (aka Throwback Thursday, if applicable).

Ummm........

OK, fine. Let's cue the ELO here, why don't we...




If not that, then maybe...


And shit, if that doesn't work, then maybe the only recourse is...



If those three don't "bring me down," well then screw it, I'm going to ride this glucoaster of being High for a bit.

And then, most likely: I'll have to tell you again, before I get off the floor (due to a triple-effect hypo).

Does that answer the question?!

If not, maybe another #DBlogWeek blogger has a better answer in mind... 

(Seriously, I get it's a play on Mental Health Month and what challenges your mental health when it comes to living with diabetes -- and so I'd double-down on my above points. Because, seriously. High blood sugars are so much a part of mental health and diabetes. It's beyond ridiculous how closely tied together those two issues are, along with other things -- like your thyroid gland being out-of-whack, lack of sleep, and so on. If you don't believe me, Google it. Or just look back at what I've shared on this very topic, in the many years past. It's totally a thing.)

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Shadow Returns To Say: The Cost of Living with My Diabetes

So, Day Two.

Diabetes Blog Week 2017.

Topic? "The Cost of a Chronic Illness."

Sure, many are writing and being oh-so-serious. Because, this issue is... oh-so-serious. And downright enraging and maddening and so on and so forth.

But there's another side of this question, relating to the cost of living with diabetes.... from the POV of "What's the cost YOU FACE when living with someone who has T1D?"

My beloved cat might have something to say, if she were around these days to speak about this.

Shadow's been gone for 5 years now, her Cat Dreams of World Domination Unrealized. But she certainly paid the price as a result of living with us and my type 1 world -- especially in the context of DOC craziness.

For example, being subjected to all kinds of strange behavior -- like being forced to wear diabetes supplies on her head... which as you can tell, SHE ABSOLUTELY LOVED! ;)


If she were around today, Shadow might say something along these lines....

ME: Here Kitty Kitty... let's have you wear this insulin pump tubing on your head...!"

SHADOW: Never.

Me: Come here, kitty....

SHADOW: No way. You pick me up when I don't want to be picked up. You trap me underneath laundry basics on the bed. And then you wonder why I try to steal your diabetes meter kit... or eye that insulin vial and syringe, knowing I could take you out...

ME: It's just a fun picture, Shadow. A-ha, GOTCHA!

SHADOW: I. Hate. You. And I will murder you in your sleep.

ME *snapping a photo to share

SHADOW: This is the cost, for being able to live in a good home with two humans who appear to care about me and feed me each day. Even if I'm subjected to this type of "torture"... and that damn idiot dog. 

ME: Now, pose for another one, Shadow...

SHADOW: *narrows eyes. You fool. Ever wonder why you have unexplained Lows sometimes? Yep, that was me, pawing the insulin pump quick bolus button while you slept...

ME: Love you, Shadow Cat.

SHADOW: Well, maybe you're not so bad... but just wait. We will dominate the world. Not even the Riley Dog will be able to save you.



(((sigh)))

Oh, Shadow. Miss you bunches. And even though you paid the price of my weirdness, it was all in good fun and out of love.

So, there it is. Shadow paid the price. All in good fun.

#LikeYouDo when living in the diabetes world.

But, you make a face and move on, because life indeed goes on. No matter what the price is you're being forced to pay for being a visible part of this D-World.


- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

#DBlogWeek on Twitter, Yo. A whole lotta goodness going on.

Monday, May 15, 2017

Expecting the Unexpected

There was a diabetes day more than a decade ago that hit me like a ton of bricks.

OK, maybe that's the first like right there... when I said "diabetes day." As if, every single day of my life isn't a "diabetes day" where my pancreas isn't doing what it should and I must take on that role and think about everything related to a D-Life.

No, this was a particularly more-focused D-day, because I had an eye doctor appointment.

Yep, one of those dreaded doctor visits where you get bright lights beamed into your deepest eye sockets, and you try the impossible of bravely holding back the tears as you look through the whiteness as you "Look Left, Look Right, Look Up, Look Down." And then occasionally, you must face the humiliating task of trying to see tiny numbers and letters and not appear stupid, or ID the closely-colored hue book that has hidden numbers and letters, but is not easy given your partial color-blindness.

(((Sigh)))

And that's just the regular stuff, aside from the ever-exciting "How are your blood sugars?" and "What was your last A1C?" questions, where I must resist the temptation to be a sarcastic asshole and just be a calm eye patient.

Nope, the real suspense of these eye doctor visits boils down the word "retinopathy." Maybe no one else does this, but I am always stressed and nervous about the end-moment where I am waiting on pins and needles for the eye doctor to tell me whether my retinopathy has gotten any worse than the last time we SAW each other (pun intended).

My first retinopathy dx'd came in early 2007 (according to what I wrote in Confessions & Complications back then).

And it was unexpected. Except for the fact, that I'd been fearing and anticipating that dx'd for most of my life since I was diagnosed with T1D at age 5.

Even though I've been anticipating that most of my life, and was ready to hear it that day, I wasn't ready. You never are.

It was about as mild as it could be, and the only advice was "keep your BGs in check," and we'll keep monitoring it. That's really been the story ever since, with little change requiring anything more than "diabetes care as it should be."

So, that's been the story ever since. I think this speaks to anything in diabetes, and well beyond into many parts of life.

You may expect something to eventually happen, but when that time eventually comes, you just aren't ready no matter how much you've thought about it or prepared. Maybe that advanced prep will come in handy and help cope or move forward, but you can't stop the unexpected from happening. You just have to roll with the punches, and move on.

Expect the unexpected. Always hope for the best, but be ready for whatever good or not-so-good eventuality is probably going to happen.

Welcome to life.


This is my first Diabetes Blog Week 2017 post. Others from around the Diabetes Online Community (DOC) can be found here, as well as on Twitter/Facebook/etc by searching the #DBlogWeek hashtag.