Wednesday, January 23, 2008

That 32-hour day

A little overwhelmed. So much going on, too little time. The 2 a.m. hour rolls around and, again - as so often it happens - I find myself awake. Body and mind are tired, but the wheels are still turning. Want to write, need to write. That story from the soul that gives you a shiver as good as the moment you see a sunrise or sunset. Want to read, everything I can - the Bible, a former journalism mentor's family memoir, history of Freemasons. Intrigued by my family history, and want to explore every depth and chronicle that genealogical story before it's lost. Gears are going on the emailed political debates with an old roommate and close friend. Another good bud brings up interesting notions in our joint-efforts to study religion. My mind goes, too, to my Michigan trip this weekend and all I need to accomplish at work before then. Work and legal issues playing out in my head, as I recap the high-profile trial I sat through today. Still have to work on the neighborhood newsletter that's due and going out soon. Neighborhood Watch issues to reflect on. Old frienships to nurture. Out-of-control health that needs immediate attention. Want to spend time at home with my wife, housekeeping and movie-watching and chatting about life in general. Figuring out how to devote and split time to both our attention-needing dog and cat. Want to have all the money to put in a fence, build a patio, plant a new tree, landscape the backyard, and paint the interior of our house. All at once. Too much debt, too many bills. Really want to catch some ZZZs, but the brain won't take a break. Meanwhile, my new contacts aren't in yet and I have to continue wearing these specs that make my eyes feel heavy, create a sensation that I'm being less productive than I could be if only wearing those contacts. It's all in the mind.

When did life become so overwhelming, so complicated, so convoluted that we push off sleep to handle every possible project that could actually wait until a later time? Even knowing that truth, the feeling remains: So much to do. Too little time.

About to brew a second cup of instant java. Swirl and dunk, dunk, then sip. Mmmm, so warm on a cold night. At least the trash and recyling's done, put out by the curb ready for Wednesday's pickup. There's one item off the list. Now, moving on to others before the sleep sets in.....

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